Kamasutra suggests that remarrying his socially accepted. The causes of re-marrying during the lifetime of the wife are as follows:
According to Kamasutra the task of wife, which she should start from the beginning, is to try to attract the heart of her husband by showing him continuous devotion, good temper, and her wisdom. If she is unable to give him any offspring she should convince her husband to marry someone else and when the second wife comes to house she should behave with her as a younger sister and gives her the position superior to her. She should encourage her to decorate herself when their husband is around or should always give her valuable advice. She should treat her children as her own, or regard her attendants more than hers. She should always take care of her relations, friends and family. She should not mind if her husband gives all his attention to the new wife.
When there are many wives the elder wife should associate with the wife just next to her and instigate the other wives to quarrel among them. According to Kamasutra, she targets the wife who has succeeded to achieve her husband's love recently and initiate clash between this wife and husband's usually preferred wife. Then she starts to console the latter one and make all the other wives together to make a group against the favorite one if there is quarrel between husband and his favorite wife. She takes the wife's part and by giving false encouragement and suggestion she tries to increase the quarrel. If the quarrel is in nascent stage she tries to make it big and sensational. But after doing all these when she finds that nothing is happening she stops all the foul activities to avoid her husband's annoyance. In Kamasutra this much is found as the conduct of the elder wife.
In Kamasutra, the conduct of younger wife is described clearly like she should regard the elder wife of her husband as her mother and should tell her everything about her own. She should not give anything to anyone including her family members without her notice. She should take care of the elder wife's children more than her own and should reveal anything what she has told her. She should love her husband but should not tell him about any of her inconvenience. She can get some marks in her private parts from her husband but should never reveal the love she has for her husband or vice versa.
According to Gonardiya, the younger wife should always make love to her husband in private out of fear of the elder wife. If the former wife is childless or disliked by her husband she sympathesises with her and ask her husband to do the same. This part on the conduct of younger wife in Kamasutra ends here.
A widow when associates herself to a man, because of her poor conditions or weak personality, she is called a widow remarried. At the time of her marriage she can take money from her husband to throw a party rather drinking party for her friends and relatives or to gift them some presents. She can also do all these at her own cost. She uses her own ornaments as well as ornaments given by her husband. But as much as mutual presents are concerned there are no such rules. If the wife leaves her husband after marriage according to her own choice she should give back everything that her husband gave her except the mutual presents but in case her husband drives her away of the house she should not return anything to him.
After her marriage she should live with her husband as one of the chief members, and always behave politely with other members of the family. She should prove herself that she knows sixty-four arts mentioned in Kamasutra better than other ladies and should not scream at her husband publicly. She should always satisfy her husband and make proper use of the sixty-four arts. She should love the other wife's children and give them presents like ornaments or different playthings. She should always take care of her husband's friends more than the other wives and should grow a liking for picnics, get together, fairs and festivals. Thus ends the conduct of a virgin widow remarried.
A woman who is disliked by her husband and so by other wives should associate herself with husband's favorite wife. She should love and take care of her husband's children and always tries to be a good human being. She should always fast and initiate the religious activities. She should always try to become a good and devotional wife to her husband by doing the following works like, if her husband quarrels with any of his wife she should tries to minimize it and settle it down, or if her husband wants to meet any woman secretly she should help him in best possible way. She should make her acquainted with all the weak points that her husband possess but never reveals it to anyone.
Thus Kamasutra describes the conduct of a woman disliked by her husband very clearly. The above sections described the behavior of the women of the king's hareem, the behavior of king shall be discussed now.
The female attendants in the harem who bring flowers, ornaments, clothes and other things to the king from his wives receive some of these, presented by the king himself. After that in the afternoon, the king properly dressed put his ornaments and carry a positive and jovial conversation with all his wives according to their position and status. Then he meets all his wives as well as virgin widows remarried, courtesans, dancing girls, etc. in their respective private rooms.
After the kings noonday sleep, he is informed about the wife with whom he has to spend night or if anyone lost her turn because of king's absence, or any wife whose turn has been passed over or anyone who was unhealthy at the time of her turn, all their attendants bring some ointment for the king and place them before him stated the reason behind sending it and marked with the seal of her ring. Having conversant about all of them he decides whose to be accepted and thus informed the wife about the settlement of the date.
All the wives of the king should be treated properly with respect and served with drinks at festivals and other functions.But the woman of the harem should not be allowed to go anywhere alone as well as no outsider is allowed to enter in the harem without proper acquaintances. The work done by the king's wives should not be too strenuous and they thus they should live a comfortable life.Thus, ends the conduct of the king towards the women of the harem, and so of their own.
A man when marries different women he should treat all of them equally. He should never tell any secrets to one about the other and thus there is no opportunity for one wife to tell about her rival to her husband. The man should try to satisfy each one of them differently like one by secret confidence, another by secret respect, and another by secret flattery, and he should please them all by going to gardens, by amusements, by presents, by honoring their relations, by telling them secrets, and lastly by loving unions.
A young woman who possesses the character of a good humor, and led her life according to the precepts of the Holy Writ, wins her husband's heart, and thus receives supremacy over her rivals.
Thus Vatsayana's Kamasutra describes the conducts of husband towards many wives.
(Last Updated on : 19-12-2008)
|More Articles in About A Wife (2)|