The Buddhists are strict conventionalist when ceremonies and rituals come. The Buddhists weddings are no exception. The expansion of the pre-wedding rituals is to manifest the formality of asking the bride`s family for their consent by the groom`s family.
The monk called Lama decides the auspicious day for the wedding. The betrothal ritual follows this ceremony. The lama recites the prayers and then a concoction called the madyan is served to the guests, this is considered as a religious drink. The astrologer or the monk carries out the rites on the auspicious day for the wedding.
Pre Wedding Rituals of Buddhist
The foremost and the most important ritual amongst Buddhists is the horoscope matching. It is thought to be quite important and is practiced with dedication. After matching the horoscopes of the probable bride and groom, the boy`s family in discussion with the lama decides an auspicious date for putting the proposal of the wedding. The next ceremony is the Chessian Betrothal ceremony, where the maternal uncle of the bride is seated on a raised platform. The priest recites prayers and gives `madyan` as a holy drink to everybody. This is followed by fixing of the wedding date in consultation with the astrologer.
The Buddhist Wedding
In the early morning, the bride`s and the groom`s families arrive at the temple. The groom`s family bring many trays containing fruits, wine, traditional cake, tea, meat, and most importantly jewelry that the bride will be getting as dowry. The trays are necessary to be either six or nine in number. Seven or eight are considered unlucky numbers amongst the Buddhists. One of the trays also contains a pair of candles, which are lit either by the bride and the groom or their parents; the tradition varies with places and countries. The lighting up of the two candles symbolizes the unification of the two families.
The couple and the assembly deliver a procession hymns from Vandana, Tisarana and Pancasila before a specially constructed shrine and the image of Lord Buddha. The candles and the incense sticks are lit before the image of Lord Buddha and flowers are offered in abundance. Next, the bride and the groom narrate the traditional undertakings as inscribed in Sigilovdda Sutta. A red paste is applied on the foreheads of the bride and the groom. The groom says the following words:
"Towards my wife I undertake to love and respect her, be kind and considerate, be faithful, delegate domestic management, present gifts to please her."
The bride in response speaks
"Towards my husband I undertake to perform my household duties efficiently, be hospitable to my in-laws and friends of my husband, be faithful, protect and invest our earnings, discharge my responsibilities lovingly and fastidiously."
Post Wedding Rituals of Buddhist
The wedding ceremony comes to an end with the recital of Mangal Sutta and Jayamangala Gatha as a blessing for the newlyweds. Buddhist marriage is very simple and does not include any complex ritual. The most pleasurable thing about the Buddhist weddings is that they are based more on faith and less on religion. A typical wedding is divided into two parts, one is Buddhist component and the other is non-Buddhist component. The Buddhist component includes offering prayers along with gifts to the monks and Buddha image. The non-Buddhist constituent engulfs customary practices followed by the family of the couple. The non-Buddhist component is deep-seated in folk traditions, followed by the couple`s family.
The ritual of red paste is created is similar to what is done at Hindu weddings. The bride`s mark is done with the butt of a candle keeping in with the tradition of not even touching women. Buddhist weddings in recent times have cut down on the complicated ceremonies involved. Monks also have a greater role as compared to previous times when they were forbidden.
The twin forces of modernity and scientific knowledge have made their influence on Buddhist weddings as well. Though Buddhist weddings are quite informal but their structure has changed extensively. Initially monks did not attend the weddings, as they had to be present during the funeral rites. Nowadays, the role of the monks in weddings has become quite reflective. Buddhist weddings are customary ceremonies and are an essential part of Buddhist culture.
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